Letting Go

When I was a little girl,

I saw the man my mom loved so dearly return that

love with anger.

I swore no matter how much I ever loved a man,

I would never let him hurt me the same way.

I grew up and had a few boyfriends.

None of them were the prince charming I had always

dreamed of.

Then I met him.

I remember it oh so well.

The moment I saw him I knew I was a goner.

He had the most beautiful eyes I had ever seen.

Oh God and his smile lit up my heart.

I thought I was the luckiest girl in the world because he

felt the same about me.

As time passed I kept falling harder and harder.

I suppose that's why I avoided his flaws.

I avoided the way he would scream at his mom.

I avoided the way he would pick on his brother.

I avoided the way he'd always find a fight to jump into.

I avoided it all for one reason,

I loved him.

I thought there must be something wrong with his

mom, brother, and all the other people he fought.

I believed he'd never treat me that way.

I believed he loved me the way I loved him.

Boy, was I wrong.

As more time passed I begged him to fix his anger

because it scared me.

I thought I would be enough to change for.

Instead he now saw me as the enemy.

What happened next I never saw coming.

I called him one night to make plans to see each other,

He blew me off to hang out with "Kristen."

I asked him not to,

He hung up on me.

The next time we spoke he screamed at me, cursed at

me, told me that I was no good.

Gone was the boy I loved who would whisper only

loving words and promises of forever.

Now the monster was out and was coming after me full

fledged.

It reminded me of my mother's pain and suffering and

of the promise I made to myself all those years ago.

I knew what I had to do.

I wished him the best in life and said good bye for

good.

I don't think he'll ever truly know how much it hurt me

to let him go,

But I know it was for the best.

I may have a broken heart now,

But its better then him putting me six feet under before

the age of twenty-one.