A deathly cocktail so enticing
taste of forbidden fruit so sweet
wondering if the poet realized
he revived a heart that lost it's beat

This hits close to home for me, crazy chickie.
I have found someone that has melted my frozen heart:) (friend, not lover)

Your poem is so very beautiful. It has a great flow, no fillers, lol and a great story in it.
I have read it three times already and will read it some more now:)
Great job, my friend!

Love, Ingrid

I love the specific details/examples you used. When I read it, I just think like delicate thoughts, lol I dont know why, but its just that good to be able to do that. Nice job

Dis poem is so emotional so keep it up

Luanne, this was beautiful.

Normally, I don't like when people repeat stanzas, but I think that's because no one ever does it correctly. You did. You told a grand story of love, of true love, and that hit me. It wasn't exactly forbidden love that I got from it, but more along the lines of two people that are separated, and wait for each other. Whether I'm right or wrong, I still got something from this. And it still touched me.
It's amazing what you did with this title. Thank you for entering my contest, good luck!

5/5
~Lace

If this is for a contest, then i'm ceratin that you would nail it hands down. The work on this poem is abolutely remarkable. I love it!!!

Luanne
What a wonderful piece. your words just swept me right in.

It was but only one poisonous wave
that swept the heart to distant land
loneliness finding solace within a voice
that crossed miles, upon miles by hand

This stanza touched my heart. A voice from far away can bring so much peace to another lonely soul.

So sweet the voice that lingered,
soothing the mind, deep and true
intruding mid-summer night slumber
secret adoration began to brew

The feelings in this stanza the ones you share with no one. The ones that fill your dreams.

A deathly cocktail so enticing
taste of forbidden fruit so sweet
wondering if the poet realized
he revived a heart that lost it's beat

These lines are so great...feelings of getting lost within the words of another. Feeling things through what they have penned.

Another time, perhaps another life
their wings shall spread and soar
but until the whisper of the final breath
her heart belongs on the island shore

Love the imagery here.
Excellent!
Love Cidy

^Within wavelets of blue a gaze befalls
upon ripples mesmerizing to the eye
lost in memories as thoughts wander
to times of foregone days gone by^

I like the repetition of this as the first and last stanza. Good flow, word choice and imagery throughout the piece. Nice job.

You had reall good rhymes, but to be honest, I only really like stanzas three and four - they had a nicer flow, and I enjoyed what was being said more.

Brad

Another time, perhaps another life
their wings shall spread and soar
but until the whisper of the final breath
her heart belongs on the island shore

I truly loved this write Lu, How many times do we dream about how things could be....but not meant to be at all. It doesn't hurt to dream though.
All of your poems reach out and grab the heart, Sometimes I think Oh how nice of you to write about my life! LOL That takes a real talent to touch others in that way!

I liked how it rhymed at the end of each stanza...I loved the depths of your pen..very captivating and always highlights some areas of learning in our lives..Good job Luu..

This is WONDERFUL!
Luu, your poems always hold a special rhyme, I never really get bored or feel like something is cliche out there.

A deathly cocktail so enticing
taste of forbidden fruit so sweet
wondering if the poet realized
he revived a heart that lost it's beat
^
I'm pretty sure this is all the readers' fave stanza :D lol..I totally loved it..amazingly written, and very well expressed..I couldn't agree more with your words.

Very well done babe.
You're amazing!
Write on~