So sad, but really well written take kare and keep up your good work xx

Try not to say ain't.
Unless it's in a slang poem.

I had no idea what you just said.

only few can witness them fall

Does that mean...
Only you can see them?
Because you're... well, loving?

only few can witness them fall
That doesn't make sense what so ever.

I believe what can make this better
Is if you put in punctuation.
Trust me, it works.

Other than that.
Be clear.
If you want to be subtle, go ahead.
But be clear about being subtle.

It had a pretty well flow to it....but I thinkyou should spell out the word "you" and capitalize he word "I"...hope it helps!

I quite liked it. i thought it was rather sad and interesting. its unlike many poems i have read which is why i like it. good use of different words too.
Taegan Emily xx

The flow was good and the message nice and clear. The only thing that bugs me is that "I" is capitolized only once.

"true that you were just a dream of distant land
its difficult to mold this broken heart."
^^^ I love the way that you close your poem. These lines are beautiful. A well deserved 5/5.
~Stefanie

The flow was good and the message nice and clear. The only thing that bugs me is that "I" is capitolized only once.

"true that you were just a dream of distant land
its difficult to mold this broken heart."
^^^ I love the way that you close your poem. These lines are beautiful. A well deserved 5/5.
~Stefanie

The flow was good and the message nice and clear. The only thing that bugs me is that "I" is capitolized only once.

"true that you were just a dream of distant land
its difficult to mold this broken heart."
^^^ I love the way that you close your poem. These lines are beautiful. A well deserved 5/5.
~Stefanie

Sad poem, understand what you're feeling,
the word ain't threw it off a little, but that's okay
it was a good poem :]

This poem is really deep. I love it, it's a lot like the things i've gone through. I love these lines in the 3rd stanza

please don't say
we met just to depart
how do I make my heart understand

it's so true. no one can make their heart understand when someone leaves you. i love it, 5/5

Well written...very emotional poem...
but there are places where the flow was off..

overall a nice write.. the emotions that you tried to display could easily be felt by the reader...

keep writing..

WAW ITS BEAUTIFUL POEM
even i feel so sad as i got the same feeling and it always got her way to go out,its hard to forget,sometimes its hard to understand why this happend, you did a good jop and you words get power to each line,keep in that good jop 5/5