I think the first two lines are more of two separate sentences than one with a comma.

The same for the last two lines of the first stanza. Perhaps you're looking for a semi-colon or something? I dunno, anyways, I'll just read the poem for now. You know what I mean with the commas and such already.

Hmmm...This is a difficult title to capture. I think it could be written better, it's not that the poem itself is bad, I just don't think it will win the contest. Try playing around with metaphors or maybe instead of having it a positive poem, being a negative poem, kind of how the guy you like is emotionally murdering you. You know what I mean.

Very nice flow with a cleaver twist I like it

I loved this thanks for your comment on "Suicide note" and dear thank you for your consern but Suicide not is totally fiction so don't worry dear I am happy as a clam.

This is cool, i liked it!

This is beautifully written. my favorite part was the last two lines; it was the first part and the last part i read. (dang pop up ads)...

its very short though, it feels like you have more to say... maybe it's not finished and you just dont know it yet.

5/5

I love it. Though it sounds more like he is surrounding you in his love, than murdering you with it. lol It was cute and I fully understand how you must have felt as you wrote this poem. =D
5/5

I gotta say, this poem is very detailed way different than mine. I love how you use details to describe how you feel. I really love it 5/5 for sure

Just as much as I love imagery in a poem, I like the use of a positive and negative force in writing (For me it is primarily apathy and empathy.)and then making them flow well together giving the piece an authentic feel, exactly what you did here. I like what you did with this poem, and liked how you described your perspective of love. Great work!

OH!!! i am in love w/ a poem ... =]
the title deffinately caught my eye
and i love the passion you have for
"this person" =] ahh this is strong and deep
and certainly not fake fantabulous job

My favorite lines are:
'Show me how you would love someone like me,
Tell me what I want to hear'

I feel like that all the time adn could really relate.

Well-written and strong emotions.
5/5! for sure!

Love
Tina

I love this poem., i love how you want the person to "murder you" with love. I never read a poem like this before with those kinda lines. very well done.

keep it up.
keep on writing.
love always and forever.

Nice poem ur expert n thx for help me I promise I do better in my poem am just begginer tho

Intersting choice of words in this one. I like this one the least out of the ones i did read. Not sure how much i like the way you used murder. 4/5

So interesting and nicely written..it had me speeechless it was so good.. wow0_5_