Comments : Passionate Discomfort

  • 14 years ago

    by StandStill

    This is rather..breathtaking. First of all, i adore the structure. it's just...it's different. there were a couple rhymes that sounded a bit forced, but other than that it was lovely. I loved the last...stanza/paragraph. it was just gorgeous, really. and the last line, vocabulary!!!! lol. wonderful job, m'dear.

  • 14 years ago

    by namless unactive account

    Wow, deep

  • 14 years ago

    by Beautiful Chaos

    "And yet I feel the doubt creeping upon me, exploding and covering the surface, seeping into the crevices, falling drop by drop into my bloodstream, mingling with my blood and playing with my heart and mind.. I see the mirror, I hear the envy, but all I feel is desolation. There is a boundless universe of emotion, and I feel so much of them and then none of them at all. I know nothing, and it scares me. But I know so much more than this... I know that, but in comparison, I still know nothing."

    Though you wrote this part paragraph style, it was my favorite part, I think it was because you let go and didn't try to force rhymes, it just felt like you were spilling your inner thoughts. Keep practicing and working on it, you definetely have potential.

  • 14 years ago

    by ViolentlyDisturbed

    I really like this one alot too you got some really great work here keep it up :)

  • 14 years ago

    by lisabrighteyes

    Wow! amazingly written!
    Very, very powerful!
    5/5 for sure!!

  • 14 years ago

    by Curing the Comon Cliche

    U are, indeed, a poet. ur words contain meaning. they grasp u and spin a tale that is deep and inviting. thank u for inviting the reader into that. deep and insightful

    good job

  • 14 years ago

    by Poet on the Piano

    Great job, lots of emotions are in your poem and you wrote such powerful words. Nice work, and take care! :)

  • 14 years ago

    by Kaitlyn Cabrera

    I loved it! I thought it was deep, from the heart, and was the truth. Another amazingly well written poem : )

  • 14 years ago

    by Amber

    I loved it! It was truthful, sorrowful, dark and completely amzing at the same time. You've got a great gift. =)