LOVE IT. UR REALLY GOOOOD

Ah. This was very good. I thought you did well with the wording, & I liked the emotion you put in it.

Good job.

-Briana

Once you hit the third line of the first stanza, the flow dents a little, due to syllabication. But I do like your word choice, and the words are pretty smooth. It's a nice opening--different, and definitely held my attention.

A jagged rigid mind living for inconstant dysfunction.
`Either jagged or rigid seemed unnecessary ... Don't know which one, but it just seemed one word too much.

I love that stanza, though. It made me think, that pain brought on by love and life and the loss of either, twists not only your soul, but your mind and your hearts to the point where we just can't function properly anymore.

Slowly it twist as the body
`twists

loves
`love's

hearts
`heart's

The imagery in your third stanza is stunning. Like a creation of what love would look like if it were one of nature's creations -- a plant. And it's so beautiful, this picture that it's created within my thoughts.

Loves parasitic ways is quite
`It should be either "Love's parasitic ways are quite" or "Love's parasitic way is quite" -- whichever flows your boat.

Ending stanza is just breathtaking. Your word play is brilliant, and the fact that this was minute poetry just leaves me appalled. Your choice of words and the way you twisted them to your own desire was just amazing. A great write, and a splendorous portrayal of bittersweet pain.

..__MiNDYY

I don't know grave digger it is difficult to maintain a flow with a rhyme scheme, but it seems to me you did really well

I really liked the word choice.

very descriptive and good job on the rhymes.

very nicee poem

Wow, this was actually pretty good. The wording of everything was perfect.. very good word choice.. and the rhyme was amazing...you used simple words, yet.. it wasn't forced at all.. I noticed one thing...but that was just a minor change.. but I think someone already pointed it out.. Other than that, you did a fabulous job, I think. 5/5.

This was REALLY good
i loved your word choices theyre so unique

Wow! I absolutely loved this poem! I saw everything that I was reading, the vocabulary that you use is amazing. Everything about it was great. I don't know why you thought it wasn't one of your better works, I think it is. :D

~Kail

Oh my I just loved this. The imagery painted by your beautiful choice of words were flawless and truly made the poem a wonderful read for me. The flow was just great and the title really captured my attention. The meaning behind your words just blew me away.

"Burning while smiling in a hearts false hope."
^I just loved this line because it flowed flawlessly and made a lot of sense. Each word here was full of power and thought.

Well done *5/5*

Wow! You have talent..I like your work. I love the feeling of this poem but I truly like your insperation of writing

This piece was amazing. It simply blew my mind away. Your word choice was great and your descriptions were even better :] You express the words so clearly and so powerfully. simply an amazing write .5/5.

O my gosh what a beautiful poem

I really, really, like this. I see how it's somewhat similar to mine, but I like yours more. =)

I specially like the "Loves parasitic way" line. Nice peice.

I would firstly like to comment on the little comment you left at the beginning

( This was minute poetry and not one of my best but i hope yall enjoy ^^.)

You shouldn't have it there cos this poem is brilliant!!!! It is such a stunning poem, your words are so haunting yet truthful and I guess that the truth is generally what people try avoid.

Wondering aimlessly with colorless eyes
Not able to blink or attempt a cry
Stuck in a gaze of a soulless dark well
Staring at emotions,only wishing to dwell.------------- wow is pretty much all i can say, they was an amazingly powerful and effective way to start your poem. a good start is always vital for a good poem!!!!!!!

Pupils are desertly dry, veins are tense
Mouth agape with torment so ignorantly immense
Feelings are shut down, incapable of moral function
A jagged rigid mind living for inconstant dysfunction.-------------- your words were so graphic here and was makes an outstanding writer is when one can write graphically and allow the reader to see what they are saying rather than just read it.

Trapped and controlled by thorny dead vines
Slowly it twist as the body and pain combine
Embracing the ties of loves deadly rope
Burning while smiling in a hearts false hope.------ love is all about pain, love is basically a set up for getting hurt although some people manage to find true love its not very often that it actually happens in todays society. love is deadly and has deadly and painful consequences sometimes. it always builds you up just to push you back down.

Loves parasitic ways are quite mutual in illusions
False happiness in exchange for death is the conclusion
Always being given a name to forever shine so bright,
As broken hearts and souls melt in the scorching light.--- like your beginning this ending was just perfect. it was so strong and powerful. i absolutely loved it. well done on another amazing job

I love this poem although the words were tricky. Lol. But I seriously love how you wrote this. Very literal and well thought out. Full of emotions and great lenth. =)

Oh and thank u for reading my poetry and enjoying it.

I would really love love it if you could read the poem called the quite nerd.

Thank you. I also rated.