Blessed Curse

I sing the melody to the saddest tune
My voice releases a whisper with no sound
yet the most devasted hear my silent cry
Oh silent God above us
Have I abandoned you?
Make me vanish away, let me part
No more love to wrap us from the cold
Only hate to free out the burn that freezes my flesh
I feel alone, oh lord so alone.
Why must loneliness cover my pores
filling them in with a pale agony
Bring down my knife i left alone
You took it away, my baby, my love
My addiction, i hunger for more
Blood no longer slides down my skin
For I have been marked as a perfect child
No one must hear the results of my pains,
My imperfections and gloomiest wishes
For I wish for a high that never goes away
To die away in an overdose of freedom and sorrow
My heart is grey wrapped around in black and white
I want to be there for the world that left me
To be a hero that no one sees
Let the world take my credit
Let them take my every desire, for I have none
Your freedom is my destruction

Please comment or rate. it's my first poem in a looong time, thank you!