Extremely wel written. Shows greater n v apt use of lexis n its just superb, awesome, fantastic, to b precise. I love the rhyming pattern.

"Looking for affection from any one who seemed warm"
-I think anyone is one word. :]
-& another thing, maybe you should expand your vocabulary. Use something different han looking. It's too common! Maybe use searching or something different. Probably something even more different than searching, searching is a pretty plain word as well.

"Sinner or saint the creatures passions would go unrecognized"
-I think you need a apostrophe in creature's. I'm guessing. I don't know for sure..

"A soldier of Christ with the Spirit which redeems"
-I don't think that spirit needs to be captiolized. But, I don't know for sure. Because I never really pay attention to those things, but I think that's one of those words that people don't know if it should be capitolized or not. =|

"In fact the awful struggle of the heart, soul and mind"
-You need a comma after soul, because you have a list.

"It cannot be missed, only when rejected"
-I would change cannot to can't. Just because you don't really see those words written out these days. If it's what you prefer, then keep it the way it is. But, the proper way is to actually say can't.

"The Creator moves in passion, in reason He rests"
-Again, a word like creator.. I don't think is necessary to capitolize.. although you'd think it would have to be.. I don't think it's necessary.
-Uncapitolize he, too.

"Only one poor in spirit can ever rise above
To humbly accept the divine gift of love
No longer will he be a creature void of form
In true colors of the rainbow after the storm"
-Wow. What a powerful stanza. Well done. This was perfectly worded.. :)

Overall, this poem was beautiful and kind of had it's own unique twist to it. I found this poem very interesting and unique in it's own way. Well done, great work.. 5/5..

"Once there was this creature void of beauty, and form
Looking for affection from any one who seemed warm
Named after an archangel, Michael who was canonized.
Sinner or saint the creatures passions would go unrecognized"

^^ Very good beginning. Rhyming is good, images and the level of description is good. You put a period, though, on the third line. I feel as though if you do that, it should be consistant through the whole poem.

"He was on cloud nine with the Eve of his dreams
A soldier of Christ with the Spirit which redeems
But the paradise lost left a lesson to impart
In a romance with one of the reapers of his heart"

^^ Wow. This is beautiful. The images your words provide are amazing.

"In fact the awful struggle of the heart, soul and mind
Fell on numb skulls, deaf ears, and the eyes of the blind
Tempted by Satan's demons, giving into seduction
The Eve of his life then became the Eve of destruction"

^^ I do believe that there should be a comma after "In fact". Maybe not; I have been wrong before. Haha. :]

"Luminous light radiant in the celestial orb
Is only reflected by those able to absorb
It cannot be missed, only when rejected
Nurtured by nature it must not be neglected"

^^ Again, your words have painted a beautiful picture in my mind.

"The Creator moves in passion, in reason He rests
Moving toward perfection all of us must pass tests
A lesson that is taught may be a lesson that is learned
By knowledge, or wisdom salvation can't be earned"

^^ Talk about being wise. The last two lines sound like something someone with great life experience would tell a young person.

"Only one poor in spirit can ever rise above
To humbly accept the divine gift of love
No longer will he be a creature void of form
In true colors of the rainbow after the storm "

^^ Wonderful ending.

Overall; this poem is very good. Beautiful imagery, and very good rhymes.

5/5

-Briana

Cleverly written poem....starts with a story, ending with perfection.........mind over matter.Very nice. Loved the last two stanzas.

"A lesson that is taught may be a lesson that is learned
By knowledge, or wisdom salvation can't be earned"

these were deff. my favorite lines.This poem was well thought and a written flawlessly.The word choice was spectacular and it made the piece more colorful.It kept my attention the whole entire time.5/5

In fact the awful struggle of the heart, soul, and mind
Fell on numb skulls, deaf ears, and the eyes of the blind
Tempted by Satan's demons, giving into seduction
The Eve of his life then became the Eve of destruction
^^
this is my fav. part.

the poem in gerneral shows a lot of emotion and a lot of debth. i can feel the emotion comming off the page.
5/5

This piece was amazing. The words you used were so creative and descriptive. The imagery was clear and the emotions were expressed perfectly. I loved this piece so much, I had to read it a second time. lol. And I'm still so blown away at how great it is. 5/5! :]

Wow. you had some really strong words to rhyme with here. I loved how you did this one, its wonderful. You are awesome at rhyming. great job 5/5

'Twas in another lifetime,
one of toil and blood
When blackness was a virtue
and the road was full of mud..
I came in from the wilderness,
a creature void of form.
"Come in," she said,"I'll give you
shelter from the storm."

-Bob Dylan
"Shelter From The Storm"
from the album: Blood On The Tracks, 1975