With all the floating and flying terms it kind of reminded me of Aladdin when they were flying on the magic carpet. Haha, I miss watching disney movies. :]

I thought this was pretty great considering I don't like love poems. >.> And I don't know what you're talking about I though the flow was pretty good! I didn't have any awkward pauses while reading it. Your imagery was excellent, like I said before it reminded me of Aladdin, so I was picturing that most of the time.

Alight upon moon,
`` I looove this line! I like the word "alight" and I also like how you didn't put the word "the" before moon. I think that really helped with the effect you were trying to make.

This was great! That's a big compliment from someone who hates love poems. XD

Well done.

Keep writing!
Cayce