What I Really Wanted

You always looked so cute

All dressed up that day in your big boy business suit

The lovely things you say

The things that make me smile

The things that make me feel so loved

Can make me go for days

When I think of a guy

Whom I loved most in my life

I think of you

You have always been beside me

When my world seemed so bad

And when everyone left my side

You were all I had

I remember when both of us

Lost someone so close

And we went through more pain

Than either of us will never know

You held me when i cried

Said everything will be okay

You were my only family to console me

When family was so far away

Your mom went to sleep

And you said I dont know what I'd do without you

I wish at that moment

That I would have said that too

Not everything was so good

In fact most of this year was grim

It's sad, two people so in love

Can hurt each other more than they ever imagined

There was pain in the past

There were words that were said

Things we wish we could take back

Things we will never forget

Well that was yesterday

And this is today

I have learned so much I cannot leave

There are two too many hearts at stake

I hope one day I am your favorite

And you will love me the best you can

For that is what I do for you

It's important to me and I hope you understand

Right now I feel so lucky

To have what I really want

You have come to me at a price

And I will not forget the cost

"Remember when I am gone"

"You are my happy thought"

"And no one loves you like I do"

"And I realized the way to love you was to realize what could have been lost