Comments : Heart

  • 15 years ago

    by Steven Topaz

    Firstly I dont know really how you write so ill judge just on this poem, You need to decide weither or not to ryhme or not to ryhme this makes the flow very bumpy and hard to catch on to. When you started to ryhme i thought you were going to keep ryhming but then you went back to freestyle in stanza 3.
    Flow = 2/5 On the one poem that you ryhmed I would of given it a 4/5.
    Short poems if done correctly will have a very strong impact. It was an Ok poem, but i see you write everyday so its an ok write.

  • 15 years ago

    by Katie

    Aww, I really like this poem. It's sweet without being mushy. 5/5 definitely

  • 15 years ago

    by DarkCrystalbtrfy

    In this poem I like how you have chosen to write about your feelings and emotions. it gives the rader a clear picture into what your feeling and so they can possibly relate to that in there own minds.

    My favorite lines in this poem are:
    You are like the sun
    Always lighting up my day.
    You are like the stars
    Guiding me gently along the way

    I like how you have the contrast between the sun and the stars and then how after each first line you have a rhyming scheme to go with it.
    I also liked the ending of your poem how you have the last two lines saying how he reminds you that he loves you
    Very well written