Comments : Questions

  • 11 years ago

    by SashaMirage

    I love the question that you put into your poem. They really give a nice effect to the subject you are writing about. This is one of your best writings...I could really feel the sadness behind the rhymes. 5/5

  • 11 years ago

    by Kimberley

    5/5 om g amazing. you are such an amazing writer. i totally felt that poem. amazing,... can sooo relate. 5/5 keep it up. you rock ~KM~

  • 11 years ago

    by PlasticSmile

    I can really relate to this poem, and so can many others out there. This was a really nice piece, good flow. Loved the emotion you put into the poem. Great Job. xoxo

  • 11 years ago

    by CanUKissAwayMyPain

    I like u ask the question and i a way u answer it urslef. i can so relate to this. very sad and beautiful. the words u choice were great. the flow was nice. reminds me things that happen to me and mi ex... so ya.. i really like it. awesome job. Keep it up!

    TaKe CaRe,
    Frenchy

  • 11 years ago

    by Blissful

    Hmm this was a bit confusing. I'm not sure what the poem was about. What I got from it was you got together with the guy you wanted but are not sure if he was the one and in the end he left you? I dont know, I could be wrong.

    "It came true. I got you. But.. maybe it wasn't suppose "
    ^"supposed"

    "You protected me and help all those around"
    ^"helped"

    You used the word "maybe" her A LOT and sometimes repitition is very effective in getting the meaning across but other times it just messes with the flow. It could have been your intention to use "maybe" in some many places to get across the confusion you felt but even then I think it was too much.

    Well done.

  • 11 years ago

    by Cotton Candy Clouds

    Does everything happen for a reason..?
    Do wishes really come true?
    Could one person change another's life?
    Can you save every person who comes to you?
    ^^ i love how you start it off with questions so many people will be able to relate to very very good tactic!

    Maybe, who's to say, that it wasn't just coincidence,
    That we met that night under all those stars,
    Perhaps we were never meant to be,
    Maybe you weren't supposed to mend my scars.
    ^^aw why? why wouldn't they be meant to mend your scars? ((this helps the reader get into the poem by having questions arise of their own great job!))

    I wished, more then anything, just to be near you,
    I know, I shouldn't complain, after all, I got my wish,
    It came true. I got you. But.. maybe it wasn't suppose
    To come true. Could there be another fish..?
    ^^ aught oh....why are you second guessing? good that you got your wish though!!!

    You were my everything, the thing that I always miss,
    You changed who I was, or who I thought I was,
    But who's to say this wasn't me? Who's to say,
    That this isn't just what love does?
    ^^ very true i dont think anyone could really really say

    You protected me and help all those around,
    You saved me, but I couldn't save you,
    Just when I thought we would be "me and you,"
    You blew away, right one cue.
    ^^ ah i loved that last line!! it was so intriguing and cleverly worded

    great job! loved the wording and things brought to attention! 5/5

  • 11 years ago

    by Brittany C

    I only saw one thing that you might fix
    "You blew away, right one cue."
    instead of "one" I think you ment "on"
    Other then that everything else was great. I think that everyone could relate to this poem at some point. I gave it a 5/5.

  • 11 years ago

    by Saving Grace

    Maybe, who's to say, that it wasn't just coincidence,
    That we met that night under all those stars,
    Perhaps we were never meant to be,
    Maybe you weren't supposed to mend my scars.

    ^^^ Loved that part the most!! So powerful and easy to relate to! Loved this write, it was one of your best i think (in my opinion). Its so....good. Your poems are filled with so much emotion and they always flow so well with the perfect choice of words. Nice work (again) 5/5