Steven, this is one of the sweetest things i've read in a long time. such an honest and loving poem. it was beautiful. she's gonna love it. 5/5

I really liked this poem. The wording was great. It was long but thats not such a bad thing. I gave this poem a 5/5. I saw nothing wrong with it.

"We share our Hearts,
Mending the cracks,
This poem a short part,
that displays loves artifacts"

Third line: there should be a "is" after "poem".
Fourth line: "loves" should be "love's".
Otherwise I really do like the beginning, it starts the reader off giving an idea of what you are writing about...

"The best thing about you
Is I will never need another,
You try to lie but it still comes out true..
I'm so glad you love me like a brother."

Second line: I would try rewording it somehow, because when I read this it didn't read well for me and it didn't make that much sense. Just my opinion though...

"We're both prisoners of the greatest war.
We're both victims, drama galore.
In a world where souls are heartless,
Where a saint like you is cursed with darkness."

I absolutely love how you write this. You captured in this poem the good times and bad times, and how you wish things would go better for your friend...

"In this world we will stand together,
With you, a true friend, as my crutch,
In a world where depression is the weather,
Bliss brought upon me by your touch."

Nice use of rhyming here, you really make it ever so clear to the reader that through it all, you are by each other's side always...

"I love your small fingers,
I love what you wear,
but I still can't get my mind off.
How much you really care."

Very heartfelt, you wrote this beautifully...

"All of my lonely days,
and you showed up and washed them away.
While you to being forced through a world of pain.
I find myself asking how you are still sane."

Third line: When I read it the wording didn't make that much sense to me. Maybe reword it to this: "While you were......"

"A hundred bullets are flying,
All coming straight for you.
Your body I am guarding,
Forever through and through."

One of my favorite stanzas, beside some other ones. I love this because you just don't say "I'd take a bullet for you" and that's the end of it, you worded this beautifully so it rhymed well and it had such a deep meaing to it that is so powerful..

"All of these songs and poems before,
and not any of the one I most adore.
So to repay you,
I will write til my hand is sore."

Second line: Shoudn't "one" be plural?
Fourth line: "til" should be "till".

"A thousand miles could never break us,
It's only a mountain or two.
It would take more than world war III.
For me to ever settle for someone new."

Awww..so touching. I can tell you two or made to be friends forever, nothing will separte you two!

"I'm an only lonely child,
You are the perfect kin for me.
With you my loneliness only so mild.
With you on my mind, your all I can ever see."

Third line: "is" should be placed after "loneliness".
Fourth line: "your" should be "you're".

"Thinking of your pain leaves me crying,
Prayers and hymns, I keep reciting,"

What a true and lucky friend you are, how kind.

"For God's name we may pray,
And your name,I will cry out and say.
I need you , your the only way!"

Second line: it would look and read better, in my opinion, if there was a space after the comma.
Third line: I don't think that extra space is needed between the "you" and "," so maybe backspace that.
Third line: "your" should be "you're".

"The only way to make it through the next day,
The only way to to fall down and say,
The only thing left in my life is true,
That I could never live without you."

Wow, you are leaving me speecless here! Not only do you write a little bit and that's it about your friend and how your friend has helped you, but you take everything about that friend and write it down, well-expressed...

"You have a beautiful mind,a shy heart,
Not many people know this,
Although I've loved this about you
from the very start,"

First line: Again, a space would look better after the comma.

"Your heart and my hand,
Playing our own instrument,
Singing in our own band,
Our bond will never dent,"

Great wording! This really made me think about friends and my own friends. They help get us through our life and are always a joy to have around. You have definetly expressed that about her with your words. I'm betting she will definetly start crying when they read this masterpiece! And the thing I love about this poem is that it isn't fancy worded and all, but its simple yet more meaningful and heartfelt than ever. And that's what counts. I could tell you wrote this straight from you heart....

"How I feel like this about you, and that I would never doubt you,
how that you support me,Wither or not your words are true,
But the gleam in your eyes makes me do things i would normally never do."

Third line: "Wither" should be "Weather".
Last line : The "i" should be capitalized.

You're more then kin, you're more then I've ever been,
You're like a sin, that without would do me in,
So now as you look up and smile,
Stand up and wrap me up,
Try not to cry, as I know you might."

Beautiful closing words, sums it up great!

"My job is done now I can sleep at night,
But trust me , it was worth it,
I Finlay got to prove to you,
That I truly, Sincerely love you."

Third line: "Finlay" should be "Finally".

I hope you didn't think I was to critical, really, I wasn't trying to be. But I think this is such an amazing piece, and there were just little things I thought you could change to make it flawless! I hope she loves/loved this very much, as I'm sure she will! What more can I say? Keep writing forever, you have much talent. Take care, 5/5 from me of course.