For your first attempt you did a very good job with this form. The poem itself is also very good. Each verse could stand alone as a poem itself. Excellent work. 5/5

A really unique format, and you have done very well for your first time at writing it in my opinion. In this piece, you clearly express your love and affection for him, and emotion is just flowing through. Great work, this was very enjoyable to read and I thought it was a sweet love poem. 5/5 from me, take care...

A very beauifull poem =) I think for a first attempt at this particular style youv'e done really well. It's always nice when a writter trys different ways of portraying / formatting poems because it makes you a stronger writter. Excellent job, it's a very good write =]