Comments : What a day(Collab with Scarredlibran)

  • 15 years ago

    by The Queen

    The idea at first was very intensed and i must agree with Cass about the ending. It made the poem somehow incomplete. Also, the word "sharpness" i think is to be revised.The repetition of lines of structure, in script in black and the word "fable" i dont think was necessary. (Still, this poem is better compare to the others ive read here.)Other than that, i think the original idea of the poem was amazing. 1st and 2nd stanzas were outstanding.