Wonderfly written!
5/5

I like your work you know what the world is like and know how to keep safe good work keep it up.

Ah gosh, this almost made me cry. I love the emotion that is conveyed from reading about these two lovers who have lost each other. Despite the fact the second stanza is so short, I feel like a whole story is told throughout it.

The only part I wasn't too sure of was this:

"For his eyes stare straight ahead
at a heaven too faraway to gaze upon."

^^ Although I understand what you're saying - if the heaven is too far away to gaze upon, then he couldn't be staring straight ahead AT the heaven.

Haha, it might just be my interpretation of it has gone wonky, but that's just the first thing that came into my mind when I read it.

No need for a long comment or criticsm here because quite frankly, I thought it was beautifiully penned, saddening, and had an excellent ending. Thanks for putting this up, you're very talented.

Once again your words are very captivating and takes the mind of the reader. It was very proffesional and had that old poetic feel to it as I read. The opening lines were very expressive and I the title was an eye catcher. Great Write! 5.5

An all right poem, not overtly good. The idea has been done many times before. I think you should have expanded on it, increase reader interest. Also, I do not like how you decide what we think are the "dramatic" lines with the "----" It just takes away from the poem.

Peace and prosperity,

(RKD)