I hope you said your prayer tonight,
Even though god cannot help you now.
Ive been under here for sometime,
Waiting for you to fall asleep.

*This is a creepy start. It makes me wonder what is about to happen next. Nice opening*

Like a trapped rabbit in a hole,
Ill smoke you out,
And eat you whole.

*I would have lked to see this stanza match the first. The style is different and so is the rhyme. Sometimes that can be distracting. Anway wasy your emotions are clear and very intense*

Your life is in my grasp.
As blood pours from my mouth,
Ill sit
Watch
And wait... As you slowly suffer.

*Same thing for this one. The imagery is awesome. I feel like I'm watching a vampire flick.*

For the gift of death I hand to you with pleasure,
And this memory I will forever treasure.

*I like this. The emotions were clear and you use very vivid words. I just wasn't a fan of the style. Anways keep it up. Nik*

This poem is creepy and yet exciting.
i like the feeling it give as i read it.

Like a trapped rabbit in a hole,
Ill smoke you out,
And eat you whole.

^^^ that is my favorite part!!

well done
~Amy<3

Loving the darkness behind it, but I think you could have gone further, it just feels like something is missing, it ended too soon and I wasn't fond of the rhyme in the end, the second line wasn't long enough I don't think, you could also do without the "and" starting it out.

Overall a nice start.

It seems to me that this dark poem hit it's mark and has a very original style

5>>>>>>>>>>>

It seems to me that this dark poem hit it's mark and has a very original style

5>>>>>>>>>>>

Its very original dark and kinda creepy but its nice but i feel like you should maybe add on to it a little bit make it longer but it had a nice opening it was nice good job!!!
:)

Damn that's good ha.
5/5!

I am not too much of fan of dark poems, but this one makes me think. I like your unique styles? although i think something is missing from it to pour out the message so that it catch the eyes and touches the heart. Apart from that, it is ok. kel.

Wow! you have a talent for these dark ones! lol another suspenseful poem in such a short package! i like this one alot and i dont usually enjoy dark poems.

This is a creepy poem
I love it
So simple but yet so there

Again the flow was a tad off. Although I liked the rabbit bit in here. It gave the reader something else to think about. It wasn't cliche. I think if you elaborated more it could being more life to the poem. nice job
5.5

This poem is great the words in it are really effective the structure is brilliant really adds to the effect of the poem the rythem is great

well done

Wicked Awesome!! I love it!
5/5

Wow this is a really dark poem but I like it. I like how your voice is of some kind of angel of death and how you're getting revenge of somebody you clearly want dead. It's really interesting. Good job.

Nicely executed. It kept me entertained and I wanted to keep on reading. The length it's good. 5/5