Wow! This could be very easily be interpreted as an updated version of Poe's "Alone" You have captured the solitary feeling of being alone. You have managed to bring in the detail of the wine and the lover as which Poe implied in his write that he was merely alone. The only company was the thoughts that consumed him. Excellent write.

Take Care,
Kay

I have to agree with Kay's comment. I enjoyed reading this very. The only issue I saw is that in a couple of places the rhyme is off. Other than that, excellent work.

Thank you for your very kind words, Dixiedaisy and Sylvia! That my poem would bring to mind to a poem by Poe, I am happy. I left most of my friends behind when I recently moved back to my hometown. It's a small town and the melancholy I've felt because of my isolation here inspired this one.

Good write here.. would like to criticize some things though:

"And pour a glass of bitter wine
And drift to sleep's merciful arms"
^
Two and's sound too much in the ear..would suggest you remove at least one.

"And drift to sleep's merciful arms""
^
I think it should be "sleeps" not "sleep's"..as far as I know..

"To dream of some fair lover's charms. "
^
Here I think it should be "lovers' "..because if it's "lover" there should be "a" before it..am I right here?

Anyway I enjoyed it somehow..though your rhyme went a little bit of in many parts.
Write on!

^Branches move and sadly sway
Their farewell to this long day
Shadows over woodlands, creep
As this village drifts to sleep.^

I like the way you start of with a catchy rhythm

^The sad song of a twilight loon
Greets the rising crescent moon
As sunset's crimson fades to black
For healing love, I feel a lack.^

The last line was a forced rhyme, which I didn't care for at all. The rest of this stanza has some vivid imagery.

^Far past the twilight's interlude
I pay the price for solitude
The night has rendered my dreams dark
So down these empty streets I walk.^

Too many filler words.....you can remove some of them without changing the meaning of the piece....like THE.....:

Far past twilight's interlude
I pay the price for solitude
Night has rendered my dreams dark.....so on and so forth.....

^Soon in my cabin, I'll recline
And pour a glass of bitter wine
And drift to sleep's merciful arms
To dream of some fair lover's charms.^

Okay..I liked the rhythm and flow of the piece. You have overused the filler words though. Several of them can be removed without changing the meaning or flow of the piece.

For example (with AND in this stanza...) -

^Soon in my cabin, I'll recline
Pour a glass of bitter wine
Drift to sleep's merciful arms
To dream of some fair lover's charms.^

I think the piece is one many can relate to and the catchy rhythm and flow of the piece keep the reader's attention. It could use some editing as I have pointed out but I very much enjoyed the read.

This was a stunning write, Nightflyer. Throughout this piece there was a flawless flow. Each line was filled with so much imagery and gave off much feelings and emotion to the reader. I loved your word choice and rhyme, this was a brilliant poem to read by you. Congratulations on the win, very much deserved!

God Bless You!

~MaryAnne

Aww... this is a lovely poem! Great job and congratulations! You deserve it.

This is one of few excellent poems i've ever read in this website. Peace, W.

Thank you all for your kind comments! Nema and Rachel, thank you for your suggestions. I read this poem at a poetry reading in Cambridge, MA last night.

Well done good flow and imagery.

Thank you, Cristopher!

Nightflyer, I very much like your poem. There were a few places where it didn't rhyme perfectly, but it's written well enough that I was able to overlook it.

This poem reminds me of some of my best friend's old work, and stirs great feelings of fondness for the poem. Thanks.

I liked it but I didn't understand what you were talking about