Comments : The World is Changing

  • 14 years ago

    by Poet on the Piano

    "The world is changing quickly
    We're all filled with fear
    Paranoia touches each of us
    We hold tighter to what is dear"

    I love the consistant flow and rhyming choice you have, plus the repeat of the first line throughout the poem adds a nice touch.

    "Money is getting scarce
    Affordable food grows rare
    Luxury is a word of lore
    Many sink in despair"

    Such truth is spoken in your words, its hard to face reality but this is what is happening.

    "The world is changing quickly
    Honest living is of the past
    People cannot be trusted
    Our dreams are going fast"

    Well-worded here, what a truthful poem this is, and makes the reader think about our world.

    "We're afraid to raise our children
    To know discipline and respect
    With all of the world's abusers
    We'd surely become suspect"

    In the last line, "suspect" should be plural to make better sense. Or add a "a" after "become".

    "Courtesy is no longer with us
    We only do what gets us by
    Our fellow man no longer matters
    Unless we count them ally"

    The first two lines were great but the last two just dissappointed me. I didn't like "fellow man" and "ally" in the last line should be plural or add a "a" after "them".

    "The world is changing swiftly
    Everything we love is at cost
    But how can we change our world
    To bring back what was lost?"

    Perfect ending, I love poems that end with a question and this made the reader really think.

    Very good point, your message was strong and struck the reader. 5/5 from me, take care and God bless you, Child of God.

    ~MaryAnne

  • 14 years ago

    by PoetryKnight

    Truly loved the poem. I mean, we all who are at this young age of 20, and then some want to have what our parents or others we know that had to work for it, we want what they got now. When we should live within our means and not go for the far out and get into debt this early in our young lives. Again, awsome poem, a 5/5 indeed