Tepms,

This was like journey into paradise:)
I absolutely adored your descriptions in this verse, the colors, the sand, water....

The sand on my beach in Holland actually is khaki, but I have seen it in many colors, from red ( Portugal) to black ( Lanzarote) to grey, stone-like ( Yugoslavia) and all kind of colors in between in other countries.

A much beautiful, tranquil verse, you should be proud of:)

*hugs*

5/5 Ingrid

What a vivid and wonderful description of twilight. Well done.

Lovely write Temps, full of passion and emotion that is being emitted via your wonderful wording. You are deff. developing as writer, keep up the great work.

Peace, Joe

So sweet! That was a very discriptive peice. Each word seemed carefully caressed and placed in it's spot. Great write, keept it up!

mandy :)

5/5!

"Lemon drop rays"

This opening line just caught me by surprise, I was not expecting this and I just stopped and re-read this. This was so beautiful and definetly put an image so clearly into my mind. I haven't heard this used before, lemon drop, to describe rays, but I like it, your imagination sure shined here!

"smile upon cerulean
creased waters;"

The thought of this is very comforting and inspiring, excellent job so far!

"it's rainbow-like
reflection--
bestowed."

Nice usage of the dashes here, and the pauses were perfect, added such a nice touch.

"Beauty sprinkles
from it's saffron
silhouette--as it
descends behind
sponge trees of
jade green."

This was just stunning, first off I would like to congratulate you on your ever-growing vocabulary knowledge. Each new poem you write seems to be more in-depth and have more beautiful words. "saffron silhouette", "sponge trees", "jade green", very original Temps, and it made me look at nature that way now.

"A pearl moon
awakens with a
yawn;"

This line was probably my all time favorite. I am a huge moon lover and I love how you mentioned it. This line was filled with peace and beauty in each word. Lovely job!

"it's scarlet
moonlight wrapped
around two lovers
nestled upon
khaki sands."

The imagery and passion created here is immense, you perfectly used the word "wrapped" and the thought of this is just breathtaking and mindblowing. I was expecting you just to say "it's moonlight wrapped around two lovers", end of poem, but you went beyond that and in more detail.

5/5 from me, worthy of a nomination, you have my vote!

Your poems just keep becoming more of a joy to read and more creative than before, keep it up!

~MaryAnne

Temps,
Your descriptions of the beautiful displays nature has for us are wonderful. You have done a marvelous job on this. Above all of the descriptions in your poem, I would have to my favorite is....

Beauty sprinkles
from it's saffron
silhouette

^^ Amazing imagery. Wonderful Job dear.

Take Care,
Kay

Lemon drop rays
smile upon cerulean
creased waters;

*Wow this is a beautiful image!! I've never used cerulean before. I'm really glad you used it here. It's so refreshing to see a new word used in such a good way*

it's rainbow-like
reflection--
bestowed.

*Something about this part seems unfinished...I don't like how you used bestowed here...Maybe it's just me. I might change that to "It's rainbow like reflection bestowed upon my face or something like that*

Beauty sprinkles
from it's saffron
silhouette--as it

*Yay!!! another great word, saffron is such a pretty word to me lol I love how great you are writing this. It's really well worded and so full of great images*

descends behind
sponge trees of
jade green.

*Beautiful ^.^*

A pearl moon
awakens with a
yawn; it's scarlet

*I would chnage the third line to " a soft yawn" I would describe the yawn to add more emphasis to it. Other than that great imagery again. I like how each stanza is just as great as the one before it.*

moonlight wrapped
around two lovers
nestled upon
khaki sands.

*Awww what a sweet ending. I really enjoyed this piece hun. You always amaze me with your writing ^.^ Keep em coming sweetie. Nik*

Beautiful....

^Lemon drop rays
smile upon cerulean
creased waters;
it's rainbow-like
reflection--
bestowed. ^

Gorgeous imagery here. Nice way to grab the reader's attention at the start.

^Beauty sprinkles
from it's saffron
silhouette--as it
descends behind
sponge trees of
jade green.^

I love your word choice with the colors. I don't think you need to say green here though because jade is green.

^A pearl moon
awakens with a
yawn; it's scarlet
moonlight wrapped
around two lovers
nestled upon
khaki sands. ^

What a nice feeling you are left with at the end. I like how you describe the moon as pearl. It really has picture painting imagery.

I don't care for the structure of fragmented thoughts. The end of the line makes the reader naturally pause so that makes it have to many breaks here.

None-the-less, you did a nice job!

Oo, that's cute. I like how you sort of did your own contest. Not all the colors, but still. :]

I liked the imagery in it and the creative way the imagery was shown. It wasn't just, hey this is yellow...or hey this is the moon. It was a beautiful metaphor for everything.

Great job, as usual. 5/5