Comments : Hapless victims

  • 14 years ago

    by Ingrid

    Yes, so many children live like this.....so many made orphans by aids and other terrible disasters...you three did a splendid job..very touching write, no doubt!

    *hugs for all you three sweet ones*

    5/5 Ingrid

  • 14 years ago

    by Sylvia

    A sad topic, hungry children and that is such a shame in this world of plenty. One blight that should be eradicated. In the last line, the word dwells should be dwell.

  • 14 years ago

    by Courageous Dreamer

    Loved the usage of domicile at the end that was brilliant whoever came up wth that idea. A great collab that opens our eyes to what is going around in our world today and that we should not forget for one second about these children. This was such a sad write but written well.. gives you that affect you want the reader to feel. Great work all of you.

  • 14 years ago

    by Gasttlee

    This is a very deep poem. It should remind us how to be generous and more active to help those that have less than us. 5/5

  • 14 years ago

    by divine divinity

    Wow. So well written, so expressive of pain and truth. Such honesty in your words, so insightful, beautifully tragic poem.

  • 14 years ago

    by Cindy

    Great job by the 3 of you on the team collab contest. Congrats for your placing.

    Listen to the screams
    of the weak and hungry,
    lost, forgotten children
    living in a world of cruelty

    This first stanza sets the story line and emotions for the next 2. So sad that this is going on in the world we live in. Especially to the innocent children.
    Great job!
    Cindy

  • 14 years ago

    by Sourav

    Good poem on the hard reality. I liked this type of poem mainly because we tend to ignore the issue. Very well done!

  • 14 years ago

    by TJ Arizona Eagle

    Can't believe I never commented on this poem:-)
    I think the 3 of us did an excellent job . A short but powerful poem
    Thanks for the pleasure of working with you :-)

  • 14 years ago

    by WakingFreedom

    A really well written poem. It's so true too.
    It's a sad truth, but one that we can fix if we tried. great write.

  • 14 years ago

    by Bhavin

    Nice job you all guys... It was a heart touching poem... I would advice you to forward it to NGOs...

  • 14 years ago

    by Robert Gardiner

    Very Nicely Written, Excellent!!!

  • 14 years ago

    by Karl Wild GG23

    I often feel parents or society are to blame for starving children or children who are criminals. Its all they ever know and I guess thats the one good thing about it. Excellent job making the reader feel their pain/sadness 5/5