Comments : Re-creation

  • 13 years ago

    by Cindy

    Jenn
    I have missed reading your poetry. I really loved this piece. The imagery is wonderful.

    I watched him walk away
    Never to return
    Sacrificed, so once again
    I may find my place among the stars

    I really loved this stanza. Wouldn't it be wonderful to be able to be a star up in the vast universe.
    Great job!
    Take care
    Cindy

  • 13 years ago

    by Melpomene

    Jenn,

    When I first read this piece I adored it & reading it again I still do. I'd like to say congrats on winning the RTVW club challenge with this piece. It was such an emotional read. Your words were absolutely elegant and I could feel your heart in this poem. You mentioned in the club that from your poems you could really see your personal life showing through and I seen it with this one.

    I honestly can't express how much I found this poem to be beautiful.. but it was a favorite out of all the poems submitted for the challenge that is how much I adored it and it has been placed under my favorite poems. I admire about your poetry that it is forever changing, you have the ability to experiment and you go all out of your comfort zone to create something excellent, here that was obvious.

    I can't pick a favorite part, and that is with honest truth. The first three stanzas were awesome, and the fifth was just as great. I liked the creativity yet simplicity of this poem. You really made me feel, honestly not too many poems really have me feeling the way I do when I read one. So thank you for that.

    "Instead I pollute your oasis
    Bleeding my poisoned love into your waters
    Condemning night
    To loneliness"

    What a clever stanza, I liked the darkness etched within your words.

    What more can I say Jenn, I know life is hard for you lately but it allowed for one thing, for you to write a beautifully penned poem and you should be proud of yourself.

    I really don't see any flaws.

    Well done.
    -Mel

  • 13 years ago

    by Rachel RTVW

    Picture painting imagery! This is a different style than I am used to seeing from you,nice to see the variety. Beautifully penned.

    That is a wierd comment Mouris.the although makes it sound like being unique is a bad thing. And what syllable count are you talking about? This isn't a form and her syllable count doesn't effect the flow........

  • 13 years ago

    by Cindy

    Congrats Jenn a well deserved win :)
    Take care
    Cindy

  • 13 years ago

    by PinkyPrincess

    Wow! I'm speechless. This poem is so beautiful! I absolutely love it! And you definitely deserve the win! Congratulations! I love this poem... It reminded me of the part in New Moon (have you seen it?) when Edward leaves Bella in the forest and she waits there for days because she waits for him to come back but he doesn't.. and eventually the police find her. You've expressed such a hurtful moment so beautifully... It was sweet and sad at the same time.
    Wonderful poem! It's poets like you that continue to inspire me to write!
    Excellent write! My current favorite =)

  • 13 years ago

    by Corinne

    Beautiful and sad

  • 13 years ago

    by Lu

    I watched him walk away
    Never to return
    Sacrificed, so once again
    I may find my place among the stars
    ^^^
    This ending is so touching Jenn and as the reader I felt your words deeply.

    You have poured your heart in to this piece and created a wonderful write and a truly touching read.

    Congrats on the win Jenn ... very much deserved!