This was a very emotional poem and I was impressed as this is your first poem on how well you portrayed everything. Also you did a descent job with the flow though at times it did mess up but it was overall a good job. Also the repetition in the poem was nice and I found it very nice. Great job and keep writing.

Lol thankyou heaps :) it's not the first poem i've had on here.. cause i deleted my ones from before cause they were from when i was in like, primary and they were really crap.. but yeah, thankyou :)

Nice! great poem and beautiful author! good combination.

Thankyou :)