Torn between waiting and not waiting.
Which is the same as pain and love.

You was never going to be his number one Kayla. And, I am SOO glad that you have come to that conclusion.

As for the poem itself. You got talent. I just wish you would write more.

As for what to be inspired about, ANYTHING! Challenege yourself. That's what I do.

The first stanza couldn't have flowed any better as an opening to the thought.

Paraphrase- IT WAS EFFIN GREAT!