Comments : Impossible? No.

  • 12 years ago

    by Britt

    I think that the layout of the poem is a little confusing, because it feels like I'm more at a poetry slam in a coffee shop, with the dramatic lights and drums, shouting dramatically each word. Again I wouldn't capitalize each letter, it really threw me off here.

    Beginning of the poem, fealings should be feelings :)

    I like the subtle rhyme throughout the poem, though I don't think it was intentional it gave a subtle flow to the piece. I think that while being able to say more in less is a good thing, you don't necessarily have to take out articles and other pieces of grammar to get your point across. I think this is a good start, and with some editing to make it flow a bit better this could be really great :)

  • 12 years ago

    by Jenni

    I actually agree with what Britt said.

    You might want to think about a different title because this isn't really eye-catching and it does not seem to fit to the poem too well in my opinion.

    I really like the idea of this and I think that this poem definately has potential. You're barely using any words, which gives the reader the possibility to imagine what you're talking about yet you set limits, which is quite interesting.

  • 12 years ago

    by Paul Gondwe

    U really can say much more while writing less

  • 12 years ago

    by Paul Gondwe

    U really can say much more while writing less