Very good poem whoever this is about must be special! :)

Very good poem whoever this is about must be special! :)

Yes, I wish things are just the ways I want them to be..but life's not always like that...

I really like the idea of this poem, but the repetition of "nerves" is less than poetic imo, unless this poem is for a specific person, who understands the medical jargon.

If it's not for a medical student, then I would recommend changing "optic nerves" for "eyes" and so forth.

I like the repetition of I could and the the word "nerves" really maked this poem more deep 5/5

Kiko, it 'was' meant to be for a nursing student. I understand what you mean. Thanks for that note.

Liliana...thanks.

Very nice although I didnt understand most of the word you used I still knew what you was saying! It is full of meaning and honesty! =D

Lol...Rowena. You're funny. But that's what happens if you're writing with someone in mind. I wish that person has a real existence. It's a twisted case for me.

It is such a sweet, deep poem.
i like how u wrote it, it makes it more powerful

Thats a really nice poem:) I love it:) 5/5

Awww, how sweet! Loved the emotion behind this piece. The even stanzas made this an enjoyable read. Keep it up!

Thanks!! I'm tryna represent F.O.P. And yes, "I Could Live For You"

I think the structure works very well here, the rhythm and pace suits your intention quite well. For some reason it makes me think of Honesty (straightforwardness), as if you're not afraid to tell this person about your love and other deepest secrets. I agree with Kiko that the nerves don't really serve a poetic purpose, although it might have a personal purpose. But if it's meant to show how much you care for this person, it's not the most romantic way to do so. Your tone really fits your intention, but the diction is what you have to work on. Simplicity makes beauty. :) I'm sure you'll be able to work on it. Keep it up!

Thanks

Aww this is such a sweet poem! I really enjoyed it... I could see the medical-ness in you from your choice of words! I loved the ending especially - I felt it was perfect and so romantic.
Great job! 5/5

Thanks

Very devoted... amazing emotion but could have been written a little better. All together pretty good.

Thanks.

This is the most beautiful poem I have ever read. I had to go grab my friends so they can read it, all so that we can talk about how deep it is. the structure, great. I felt every bit of love from it. 5/5.

Wow!! This is the best compliment I've gotten on a poem in a long time!!