Comments : Storm

  • 12 years ago

    by A lonely soul

    "The crack of a tree
    breaking in the night
    in the middle of a forest
    that has lost the fight"

    I would say a very strong opening stanza of a poem filled with metaphors.

    "The hellacious winds
    disturb the peace
    of the once beautiful land
    which is now deceased "

    A stanza with such powerful imagery.

    "The little ones go first
    at the beginning of the storm
    though as the winds get stronger
    all is deformed"

    Thsi is also very telling, but perhaps to the reader it seems difficult to interpret. If the last line was "all is lost" or "all is destroyed/annihilated", one could make sense, but the "deformed" ending is somewht mysteriious. Care to put an annotation to your beautiful work to explain to the reader?
    5/5

  • 12 years ago

    by Stephanie

    Thank you for the comment on my poem :)
    On the last line I say "all is deformed" because it's not all just gone. It's still there, still able to grow again, but not for a while. The older of the bunch, which are the stronger, will be mostly mangled, on the verge of death,but not quite, therefore it is deformed.