I swear it doesn't look like a collab, that means it's perfectly written. Each stanza flowed in sync with the other, and I like how you incorporated the idea of time being the 4th dimension, and all the suspicion.. I can hear the clocks tickling. Great job.

Very Good Collab by 2 amazing writers :).

I love how you guys used time to express love. Saying that will you leave me behind dangling in the clutches of time.

You can see the way you used the beaches & the tide vividly.

Great job :)
5/5

You both have done a very good job in writing this. The flow was smooth and it touches the reader..liked it :)

Time, will it ever turn back
to catch the tide that I missed
the youth that I lost
for my love, that was unrequited

I once heard, time and tide wait for none..

One of ur bst..defo a mp..
Ful points

A great job with a powerful message.
It flowed so smoothly, and said so much.
Maybe another is in the future for the two of you to do.

Connie

Time is precious
so much to do
so little time,
in this left over lifetime
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
The opening stanza is quite powerful in itself as it opens up a lot of questions - it did for me. It made me want to read more!

I love how you used the analogy of the sun setting with dying - making it sound so beautiful and peaceful.

Time is the 4th dimension
my presence in it, a reality
my past, an illusion
my future, a delusion
^^^^^^^^^^^^^
My favourite stanza - loved how you used words like delusion and illusion and reality all in one go to describe the stages of your life

So much to share, but does an angel care?

Would you even come to my rescue
when my heart is ready to stop,
starved of love, not lust
will you deprive me of the breath of life?
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Eeven though you're talking about death - the use of the word Angel can be taken as Angelic or as a woman - lover. I took it as the lover perspective - I love how it can mean both.

I quite enjoyed this poem and think you both did a wonderful job

x

This was a strong poem that was very heartfelt. I was deeply moved by it. The poem as a whole is very emotional and parts of it reminded me of a situation from my past.

"Time, will it ever turn back
to catch the tide that I missed
the youth that I lost
for my love, that was unrequited"

^ My favorite stanza

Well done both this an excellent collab.

5/5

This was really awesome. great read you guys

This poem was pretty decent