/I'd like to skip you across the river
and watch it swallow your fish-eyed expression
in its murky mouth
I loved the imagery in these lines... profound and beautiful write
8 years ago
I love your rhyme through the end of the first stanza, and was a bit sad to see you didn't dabble in any rhyme throughout the rest of the poem. I feel it would've went together more easily that way :)
I like the second stanza best, mostly for its funny (well funny to me lol) imagery, but also the depth you can dig into to really feel what you're feeling. It shows some disdain, light hatred here. Love that difference.