A kite in love

Thaks boths for these advices, I will work a bit more, even with the thesaurus,
I just had the idea, that the wind is the force and the kite is near a tool for the wind, like it is playing with the kite soul, and just take what it will and blows away

The idea was amazing how the kite and wind are together as one ... i agree half and half with my friend abed ... some more creative words would help but my specialty in poerty is simple poerty and it can work ... i just think you need to be more powerful with your words ... as if you was the kite and your lover was the wind ... you no you could fly the skys with out her ... overal i see alot of protental in this peice the idea is unique to me ... Dig deeper and im sure its wouldnt just be good like now but stunning

hope these helps ... keep writing

Those are some corrections:

fiance (2nd line)
there (6th line)
are (8th line)

- It's a good poem, indeed, but a tip from a friend: try to hook the readers with some figures of speech by using some creative words, not just simple words. Where can you find that? in a thesaurus, you can replace some words.

I hope you take that into consideration :)

~ peace