Comments : This is me

  • 12 years ago

    by L

    This is sad, the following is the saddest for me because sometimes I feel like that and I want answers but huh it annoys me because I don't even know what to ask. Very good write.

    "here, wishing for
    answers to everything
    although, I can't recall
    having questions
    to begin with. "

  • 12 years ago

    by nouriguess

    No wonder I adore you Yaks. No wonder I feel you a sister to me for some unknown reason. I so see myself in you, like you can never know!

    Yes, this is you, the ever fragrant poetic you! Have I ever said before what I truly enjoy reading your poetry? Simplicity, first of all, because whatever you write is easily understood yet it holds so much meaning and emotions. Secondly, because you find the deepest subjects to write about. Thirdly, because I relate ALL the time. So, in all, your poetry is something so special that I always feel good to be surrounded by. Although this poem contains sad images, I felt when I read your title that it might have had some kind of confidence, that's been shown in your title. Like, this is me, nothing more, nothing less! But then when I started reading, my heart ached for you and I was moved like mountains away due to your softness and pureness. Your words honestly reached my very core, Yaki. I like how you began with that sentence as well, as a confirmation. The lungs beside you image blew me away. Midnight is always cold, I mean even scientifically, there is no sun and no liveliness. So it's cold both ways, emotionally and practically. I love your simple metaphors especially being vulnerable when thoughts gush into your mind, how sad and smooth! I love the use of 'newborn' between your vocabs, it just sounded out of the blue and unexpected (in a good way).

    'with the soft pounding
    of my heart as the only
    one willing to stand
    to declare I'm alive'

    That made me feel so down, for I'm always experiencing such moments where I feel powerless and not alive! Like literally, your mind just stops thinking rationally and it begins to show weird images. I have been going through times like this for months and you've just put it down here in a way I could never express. I just have one little thing to suggest. I guess 'to declare' would be a bit better if it was 'and declare' right? Only to avoid repeating the 'to' twice, or you can say 'declaring'. I am in LOVE with the 'so called lover' thing! What a new simple sad phrase. As if your heart says he is not your lover but your memory says he is. I'm impressed! Don't ever oblige yourself to be with someone you don't want to be with, dear, I mean it, I'm not just 'philosophizing' here. I'm telling you that because I had such an experiment.

    I truly felt nostalgic while reading your poetry haha I missed it too much! I couldn't resist this piece so I could care less about my credit and wrote this little comment through my phone, you must feel lucky and loved, lmao. Oh and one more thing I don't think 'love' should be defined, in the stanza before the last one. ;) Keep writing, twin.