Andrea,

I adore this. I'm not sure what it is that keeps drawing me back to this poem, I have read it four times already tonight and I keep on coming back. I guess I feel like I should comment on it because I've had such a strong reaction to it. For me this poem really marks the ending of a relationship, it's simple and to the point which is really how relationships are. While a lot of endings to relationships are often complicated when it's over it's over, that's it. Of course things are similar throughout the ending of most relationships, especially the missing of that person in your life and I think that's what you clearly displayed here.

I feel like this poem is creating images that are a state of mind, built in dreams so to say. The mind often deals with reality when dreaming and when you mentioned the word pillow, even though it wasn't in the context, pillows and the word 'white' are usually associated with dreaming and sleeping and so I feel like you could easily be referring to this. Of course the 'land of dreams' really helped to emphasise this idea.

I think what I was most fond of were the final three closing lines. You set the scene and it was filled with nostalgia and reminiscence. This was truly a beautiful poem from you and I believe you created an amazing scene from the prompt you were given.

Andrea,

I adore this. I'm not sure what it is that keeps drawing me back to this poem, I have read it four times already tonight and I keep on coming back. I guess I feel like I should comment on it because I've had such a strong reaction to it. For me this poem really marks the ending of a relationship, it's simple and to the point which is really how relationships are. While a lot of endings to relationships are often complicated when it's over it's over, that's it. Of course things are similar throughout the ending of most relationships, especially the missing of that person in your life and I think that's what you clearly displayed here.

I feel like this poem is creating images that are a state of mind, built in dreams so to say. The mind often deals with reality when dreaming and when you mentioned the word pillow, even though it wasn't in the context, pillows and the word 'white' are usually associated with dreaming and sleeping and so I feel like you could easily be referring to this. Of course the 'land of dreams' really helped to emphasise this idea.

I think what I was most fond of were the final three closing lines. You set the scene and it was filled with nostalgia and reminiscence. This was truly a beautiful poem from you and I believe you created an amazing scene from the prompt you were given.

Falling
hearts dangle
in a land of dreams
as a pillow of dead snow
reminds the soul of precious moments
that decay slowly in my thoughts.

- ouch - again another painful poem. filled with inner pain that has perhaps been kept in too long. a pillow of dead snow is so so powerful. I feel the use of the word slowly, after decay works so well also because it shows it is not something that is happening quick, it is slow and even more painful that it drags on, making the pain more evident and sharp. The opening line of hearts dangling just goes to show how fragile they are and how much they go through. Very powerful words.

Burning petals remain in a vase
upon a table where we once dined for two,
alone I sit, falling in love with the past.

- I could clearly picture this, the loneliness of what is, but the comfort of what used to be. Reliving past memories to bring them back to life and not have to face the truth of loss. The burning petals is powerful because they wouldn't burn for long and would just turn to ash within seconds which I take to relate to your emotions and probably your heart and how it feels it is dying too.

Very deep words and again, in such a short poem!!

I like the layout also as it is very eye catching and makes a difference to how it is read.

Oh my this was so heartbreaking! I especially loved your use of "decay". It worked perfectly what the theme of the poem...something from long ago decaying because it wasn't giving the necessary things to stay ripe.

And that title...perfection.

Great piece! I'm glad I read it. :)