While I don't approve of what this poem is about, I have been in that place before. I wish my words could be razors so you didn't have to use them in that manner.

My suggestion for correction is:
After numbness, there should be a period.
Also, auto pilot should be auto-pilot, I believe.

Much love,
IdTakeABulletForYou

N, another brutally honest write from you. I wish you didn't have to resort to hurting yourself in order to feel. Although I haven't reached that point myself I feel your pain and understand to a point why that is a method some people choose. I'm hoping that your writing and talking it out will help you before you do that. Please, please take care of yourself-hugs-Brenda

N, this is a powerful and honest write from you and I know it's probably literal so I'm sorry that you have to resort to this to feel something. Life can feel so difficult at times that it numbs us into submission but we have to remember that we can cone through this the other side no matter how long the hurting takes. I've suffered depression some years and am finding myself stuck in a rut every so often. I personally feel it doesn't go but we do last longer periods between our outbreaks.
You know that I'm here if you ever need to vent about anything. Also, I hope writing somewhat helped to release the pain you've been feeling.

Em

Hello,.

A good job here. I love the structure, it is really pleasing to the eye. Also, the single highlighted lines that act like stepping stones through this painful process.

Take care x