Comments : What had stopped me???

  • 7 years ago

    by Meena Krish

    Yes sometimes we think its a writer's block too until we realize its the very pen itself that is having problem!

    What's gone wrong with me???
    I am not able to write a single thing.
    What had stopped me?
    Is the darkness roared,
    Or the light cracked,

    ^^Here I feel it will read better if the "is" is replaced
    with "has=has the darkness roared or has the light cracked. I also feel maybe another line can be added after "what had stopped me?"

    What going in the world,
    That has stopped me.
    I can't write anything, why why why?

    ^^What's going on in the world (will read better)
    which has stopped me
    I can't write anything
    free, free, free!

    Breaking up the sentence will be another good idea and a little subtle rhyme will make it sound nice and when you read it perhaps makes the reader's thought
    to expand..

    Just a few suggestions see how you like it :)
    Keep penning!