Comments : Time Machines (acrostic)

  • 4 years ago

    by Kitty Cat Lady

    Ah brilliant Michael! A rhyming acrostic about time travel ... what's not to love!
    On a galaxy-wide Doctor Who level, retracing steps and saving the planets is great, but on a personal level, would anyone really want to go back in time to spare themselves the pain? What else would be undone?
    So many good things come from what seem like bad situations at the time ... I'm not sure I'd go back and change it.
    Very 'thinky'! :-) x

  • 4 years ago

    by Em (marmite)

    Hey Mr D. It really is great to see you back gracing the pages of pnq.. There really is no getting rid of us is there? Anywayssss..
    Title: it does what it says on the tin I guess as acrostics do but where will this time machine take us? Are we off 'back to the future?' well, I hope not as I'd rather live my life myself than try winning millions from some sporting comic haha although it'd definitely help wouldn't it? Lol
    Time: there's so much we can do with time isn't there? We can let it pass us by or dwell on it (maybe that's the same thing but you get my meaning or at least I hope so) but what a way to start off this fantastic piece with trouble… what I got from this is that time hasn't been kind to you here because it's rotten, smelly and left you somewhat breathless I suppose because things have happened that are out of your control and how you wish you'd be able to go back in time to change those things, people, places that have been cruel to you and don't we all? I absolutely love the ‘seeing spine’ phrase because wouldn't it just be swell to have one of those that in time (see what I did there haha) stop us from getting hurt and feeling broken.
    Machine: oh my goodness Michael this is relatable and is extremely powerful, saddening and beautiful all at once which I have come to expect from your works I must say. Wasn't expecting the word ‘mesh’ but it fits perfectly with the whole piece that ‘space and time are thin’ and once they're gone they're gone just like people, words and actions are,or at least in my experience. As I said in my comment about the time stanza wouldn't it be nice to be able to retrace the steps we take, rebuild the bridges the have broken and take back the words we've said in anger to stop us from being hurt and hurting others but unfortunately we can't try as we might to do this though we can fortunately learn from the mistakes we make and those that people make towards us. Please if you find/make this time machine then don't forget where I am and allow me to use it?? I'd be eternally thankful lol
    Oh and congratulations on a fantastic acrostic which in themselves can be difficult to do let alone rhyme and rhyme well as you have done. Superb work. I also like the imagery you portray in this, it is very thought provoking of a man/woman scorned.
    I completely agree with kitty's comment too though whether we'd actually on a personal level go back to save ourselves the heartache, it would be nice I'm sure but as she so rightly said what other things would be undone??
    Take care
    Em x

  • 4 years ago

    by Michael

    Mr D
    a piece timed to perfection, wonderful job.
    Michael :)

  • 4 years ago

    by Ben Pickard

    Michael, I say this in earnest. This is genuinely brilliant and if any formed poetry deserves highlighting, it's poetry like this. It actually touched me as I read this - those last lines are superb.

    All the best as ever,


  • 4 years ago

    by Khai Montegrande

    such wonderful words on this poem.