Comments : Refugee

  • 1 year ago

    by Jamie

    Another wonderful come back poem from you :) These are just my thoughts might be right or wrong but either way:

    1st stanza- When I think of daydreams I think that a person dreams of something beautiful. So each day dream you have dreamt was for a better life perhaps. And you have hidden yourself behind religion for a long time. To me it says you didn't want to let certain people to get behind those mine fields inside you.

    2nd stanza- This is good continuation. To me this says that you were begging for a better life and perhaps for a short time you found it. But then things have changed. You let someone in and they have changed, and now you have been clashing with them for a long time.

    3rd stanza- Your thoughts have been hurting you for a long time. You let those feelings keep building up for a long time and your soul and heart has become calloused. And if one more thing goes wrong it could set you off.

    Third stanza- line 4- calleoused should be calloused

    Ending- Wow I did not see that coming, but it is great because in my opinion it wraps up the poem well. It seems like the war is inside you and you don't see it as beautiful. You want to love this person but it's difficult when you have had negative feelings build up for so long it's difficult to see any other feeling.

    Wonderful writing altogether.

  • 1 year ago

    by - Mr. Darcy

    This is so good it needs nominating ...

    Anyone, anyone?

    • 1 year ago

      by Jamie

      I would if I could. Lol

  • 1 year ago

    by Poet on the Piano

    So I keep coming back to read this and I get more meaning out of it everytime. The line about war zones gave me chills, because I feel a sense of vulnerability and.... there's just so much to this!

    It's a bit cryptic and I keep wondering if you mean yourself, this fragile soul, or you are feeling trapped within this life you that you don't want for yourself. The first line made me think of our survival instinct, sometimes checking out of reality to simply keep going. Surviving off of daydreams and the hope of what could be.

    Will have to read again, so much depth in this!

  • 1 year ago

    by Em (marmite)

    This is fascinating to say the very least