Comments : Three fifty one

  • 3 months ago

    by - Mr. Darcy

    Morning, it is here.
    As I read down the page I thought you were going to loose control. But, you decided to calmly stay in.
    I think playing it this way shows the reader how difficult facing the world can be? Although the emotion isn't screaming off the page, the undercurrents of disappointment are there. The desire to face the world, your fears, but the inner voice telling you, no.
    Nice work.

  • 3 months ago

    by Milly Hayward

    I agree with Mr Darcy it is subtle but the undertones depict very well the difficulties sometimes of facing the world. The tiny unfulfilled decision of which colour eyeshadow can be the catalyst that makes it impossible to leave. Milly x

  • 3 months ago

    by Michael

    Vanesa,

    This holds such an impact of how you really feel while doing one thing. That thing being something we do every day, almost a mundane thread that winds down, to an ending where there has no pleasurable outcome, but have to do it all the same.
    great piece, M :)x

  • 3 months ago

    by Shruti

    I found this sad. The first line, especially. I don't know if this is what you were trying to imply, but these few words remind me of the beauty standards, the trends, and how one has paint one's face to be pretty.

    Pink or Orange?
    ^ I relate; I have so many times ending up cancelling my plans because I could not decide which dress to wear. Underneath it all, when we are trying to choose, we are only thinking of how we would appear to the other person if we wear this or that. Would I look pretty?

    I love this poem. Few words speaking loud.