This sent chills down MY spine:
"I imagine counting all the commas
on your spine"
The grief in this, the earnest yearning and longing for an answer, for a continuation of this love that will not be...
It reminds me of all that we try to keep alive and the dreams we desperately want to keep afloat. Looking at this from the "life" perspective, which I saw was the category you placed this poem in, I think of the way we try to ground ourselves perhaps, to keep from losing who we once were or what meant the most to us. Sometimes it isn't healthy to completely banish every memory or seek to start on a new slate, because we need to have a balance between reality and also understanding our wants/desires.
Everything about this felt so surreal. There are still people in my life I think about and mentally don't place a period after their name. It's a complicated history, and complicated to remember, often painful too, but having that clarity of appreciating their presence, well that's something too.
Semicolons can hold so much meaning, whether for our own survival, knowing our story isn't over, or realizing that someone else may no longer be with us in our every day life, but there is not always emptiness and dead ends...