Lost hope

I sit here writing poems
of grief and love and friends
They tell me that I'm useless
The pain will never end

They walk behind me taunting
Of things they found today
Yes my gran is dying
Yes Im bloody gay

So while theyre all there laughing
Its going round my head
The place where I would fit in
A place where pain is dead

I hate this fear inside me
Im scared that they will know
I look into the mirror
and see I have to go

I pack and leave a message
Of things I should have done
I dont know where to go now
I think Ill take my gun....