Be careful what you wish for: "Now i get to die"

They look at me
As if im not there
Like im a ghost
Someone who doesnt care

But as much as i joke
AS much as it all goes right through me
Inside its slowly killing
Making an impossible disease

And i cant take it
There or here
SO maybe its just the way it is
I am meant to leave, never suppose to live

These thoughts
Keep intensifying
Making me scream inside
But why cant anyone understand
THis is how they wanted me to die

SO even if you feel that sadness
Just think back before
ANd how you told me you wished I'd die
WEll now that wish is granted by suicide