not too bad, some of the lines could be altered. One has too many "less" 's. But overall not too bad.

Ya know at first I didn't get it..But after reading it 4 more times... Eirisa this poem is so meaningfull..I am ABSOLUTLEY loving how you are trying new styles and coming out with brilliant poems!! 5/5 sis! Very NICE
Your lil sis,
~Chelsey~

Mandy the less's are my emphasis in the lines your talking about - perhaps you should try reading my rhyming poetry - thanks for your feedback tho hun!

Thanks can anyone give me and opinion what they think this poem is discribing or emphasising on?

been there done that excellent poem