WOWW I RLY LIKE THIS. especially the whispers in the brackets! original and veeeeery affective keep it up xx

Good job David.

wow....great poem....I love it! very, very expressive and very graphic. i could see everything you wrote, which is good....to accomplish imagery in poetry is a great challenge few can master....great job.

simply amazing poem! so sad, tho! keep it up!

Tom

Wow, I really like that
and your little () thing being the whispers I got chills..
That is so sad and shows your talent...
5/5 from me to you

Don't like suicide themes, but it doesn't make it a worse poem-great job, 5/5-nice rhythm.

An exellent sad poem! Keep posting I love to read ur work! Take Care! 5/5

Great poem, it was really beautiful

x0x0

liked this poem, the whispers worked really well and the poem itself is great, keep it up

lu -x-x-x-

that is a awsome poem man i love it alot

omGG....dat was so great well done Mwazii XOxox Stephy :)

It almost reminds me of a song that "Brand New" would do, which is a good thing. Well done.

That was awesome! Very original too! I love it! :P Kepp writing! -C'ya

StRaNgE, but in a good way, i really enjoyed this poem as it was refreshing and enjoyable to read as it was very very unique......LOVED IT!!!!

Nice write. I love how you wrote this. Excellent job. Defidently 5/5. <3333

Great idea!The words in () create a mystery and quite, easy desperation.I think you made your point very well here,very good poem!

This is a good poem. People accually do that. It's really sad. and then there is the ppl that just think they wanna. it's all sad. Great job tho

Love Alwayz,
Katie Schettler

wow.... that is really really good i love that... awesome job... its like thought provocting great job

Great rhythm...I love the whispers...you're a creative writer...

xxx

your poems are great i just cant stop readin them lol