Wasted Writing

I would sit down with my journal every night and day.
I wrote on and on about you without delay.
Millions of pages with thoughts about you,
About how you made me laugh and how you had no clue.

I filled these pages for more than two years.
And one dark day, you confirmed all my fears.
You spent more time with her every day and night,
So less and less about you I tried to write.

So instead of the great times we had and the fun things we did do,
I wrote about how my heart hurt every time I saw you.
My friends told me to get over you, but they didn't understand.
My journal is the only one who knew how deep my feelings ran.

I read over my past with you a couple of days ago.
All of my thoughts and feelings wasted, with nothing to show.
I spent so much strength and energy thinking and writing about you,
I wish I could have seen into the future, that I ended up being a fool.

We're still inseparable friends, for the fact that you never knew,
Because no matter what, I didn't want to lose you.
But because I never told you how I felt, I ended up with jack.
I just wish I could get all that time back.