This was a really good poem, but the line "at least" I think is a little over-used but maybe I just read it wrong, otherwise it was really good, on some of my poems I use a line over and over but that being the main "feel" of the poem, its kind of hard to explain what I mean, but it was really a good poem, but think about maybe changing a few of those "at least"'s to something else and combine both "at least" and umm for an example "at last" I might be wrong.. but I just think that that would sound better. 5/5.

Well, first of all I don't like the second line. It's English class, so here's a lesson: It's an onomatopia (major spelling on that word) and it really doesn't fit into a peom. I suggest chaning words just a little...Secondly, I agree with you, I prefer rhyming so much because it makes everything flow easily, but sometimes you just can't. I really enjoyed this, and you're brave for showing this to an english teacher...I'd be afraid of them putting me into an insane asylum. Well, excellent job my dear. Tusch for now.

Sheena

I dont know if you could call this a rhyme or not , but i think this was a really good poem. lots of imagination!4/5

It dosnt rhyme...lol....

Sorta hard to believe thats for an english assigment, if i ever handed it in i would be in councling for the rest of my schooling days..which well im sorta am anyway haha anyway its very well written, dark and beautiful, very well worded, it all is written very well,

Hmmm...i didn't think it was that bad...I guess i can explain it more througholy to my teacher, he'll understand that im not psycotic lol

Not too shabby :) this really had a lot of great images in it, and your execution of the unrhymed poem is pretty strong.. one thing..

Ties tied tight so not too bleed

the alliteration of this line hinders a easy flow,.. its kinda like a tongue twister lol.. anyway.. the repetition of atleast HAS to be intended, as you used it every 3rd line.. by no means did the repetition compromise quality in this piece, but i also dont think it stood out as a highlight in the piece.. it was just there,.. i honestly didnt realize it until a second review of the poem... good job on this, i always enjoy to see someone breaking from their usual style.. pZ

Alright. First off I'd break it up a bit into stanzas. This poem is a bit of a soliloquy (or a monologue I guess), and thus the speaker should be breaking up their thoughts into generally understandable units. For example, you should start the second stanza with the "let it rain acidic" line, as it seems to be a slightly different line of thought from the line above. You can get the coversational tone of the poem out more if you organize it into stanzas in my opinion. As for the not rhyming aspect of it, i enjoyed it.

It wasn't that bad didn't rhyme that much but it was still a very good poem 5/5

I know poems dont have to rhyme...but this poem would just be flippin AMAZING if you had a better rhyming scheme ....it is written so beautifully....4/5