Hmm this is pretty good. There is too much repitition of the words pain,stain, and "but you don't even know" which makes them loose some of their power. The rhyme scheme is random, and inconsistant, which throws off the flow. Its good other than that

Wow. chris.. ignore what that one chick said. the words REPEAT cuz its a SONG. yea...

anywho. i loved it, as usual. so yes.