My mistake

I want you to be my world,
Though as I see you staring into her eyes,
Holding her so tightly,
Like your never going to let her go,
I can't help it to realize,
That you've just got to know,
I want to hold you in my arms,
I want you to smile at me,
I want you to tell me you love me,
As we lay silently,
Though I know,
You're never going to let her go,
A tear strolls down my face,
Never have I ever felt so low,
As I think these thoughts,
Of letting myself go,
I will regret not telling you I know,
So It's the next day,
I see you walking down the hall,
After you drop her off at her first block class,
Rapid thoughts, what do I say?
Maybe I should call,
But I can't you've got to know,
Before I loose control,
Either you take me in to your arms,
Or tonight,
Satan's welcoming me to hell,
Hello, I say as you greet me with your charms,
How are you?
Very well,
Please say you love me too,
I want to tell you I love you every single night,
I want to hold so tight,
Then you look into my eyes,
Ever so sweet,
Without any lies,
Trying to be discreet,
You whisper in my ear,
Telling me my biggest fear,
Then silently I walk away,
With my Chemistry book in my arms,
Remembering only the best of you,
Then that night the tears begin to rush,
I write down my sorrows but nothing helps,
So I run,
I run as fast as I ever have before,
There I am,
Standing on one of the biggest bridges in my town,
Fear fills my stomach,
Vomit fills my mouth,
Over the side of the bridge I go,
Theres no turning back,
What do I do?
This isn't suicide,
So as this river fills my lungs,
Once it's done I will feel no pain,
Though I feel as if My tears filled this river,
Ive drowned into nothing more,
but water and sand,
nothing I planned,
Though I have slowly faded....