This merry christmas

Its that time of the year again,
look onto the streets,
everywhere you see cheerful people,
spending time with loved ones and buying them treats.

for us however,
it just feels so cold,
so quiet and depressing,
still scared and hurt from what we were told.

unfortunately all those accidents,
arguments and problems unfold,
we try to overcome them,
but they come so quickly, it hurts us so.

almost a month now,
and they continue to come,
Christmas is about giving,
but i even became envious of the happiness of some.

i remember how she clung onto you,
how i became so crazy and jealous,
you didn't have a choice and my actions angered you even more,
but just think if things weren't like this, and i took her place that day, this would be such a Merry Christmas.