Apologetic

Is there ever any wonder
Involving our deep slumber
You caught me at a bad time
When I was more silent than a mime
I didn't mean what I said
I felt so awful
I almost put a gum to my head
Now I regret my life
While staring at this knife
I said I wished you'd die
But I'm now closer to death

Iâ??m not asking for your forgiveness
You can keep hating me
And ill accept my desperateness

All my feelings have been torn
I hate all the faces before me
A selected few
Including you
Give me despair
I am despised
You should not be surprised
No one should help me
They should behead me

I regret losing you
I don't know what to do
I have no chance
But I can still keep my stance

I'm not asking for your forgiveness
You can keep hating me
And ill accept my desperateness

I'm thinking of what I love
Coming straight from my heart
Which has been torn apart
You plus a few keep it together
While my emotions are as light as a feather
I don't doubt that I was cruel to you
You can kill me when youâ??d like
But ill help you when you ask
And assign me a task
Now I live an empty life
I've lost my best friends and more
But you I still adore
I feel ill never get your trust