Hey jai (what a unique name!)
i'm so glad you got the piont i was trying to make when i wrote this. you need someone to lean on in life, i know this so well, it hurts. God says in His Word that we need to lean on him for everything, but i struggle to have faith that He is really there. i've prayed for a friend for so long that after a while i gave up. i dont know why i try so hard to seek that out, it's just a need that cripples me. i get so deppressed sometimes, that i feel like a withered old stump, just waiting to die. it's so scary here in this homeless shelter. i'm nineteen and i dont even have a job. i'm homeless alrady, and it's so hard to be motivated when you've got no one that gives a damn. i feel rejected, and worse of all this rejection comes from my parents. i'm so pissed at them right now. God expects me to forgive and forget what they did to me, but it's so hard.... it breaks me if i even try to. everyday i am costantly reminded of how tough i got it because of them, i try to be strong, but on my own i fail.

i will keep writing cause it's all i got right now. if i dont keep writing i'd probably be dead in a day.

thanx for your support, you have given me some hope to live off of. just please dont forget about me..... :)

We will never see that we need each other to survive. humanity sucks. our minds are so twisted. the terrible thing is we are mostly influenced by these terrible things when we are young. i wish that everyone could raise there children right but that wont happen. there will always be the ones that were raised to belive that gayness= wrongness and friendships will always be forever twisted. im much much closer to my online frieinds than my friends at school. none of my friends at school know my secrets. only my online ones i can trust. true and pure friendship is but a mere rumor made up by happy children.

Somday i hope..to many peeps telln us ot be totally independant..

lissa