I'M REALLY NOT OK

My insides burn
while outside I smile
I laugh while I am around others
when really I think everything around me is vile

Expressed on my face
are nothing but lies
it hurts me so much
its a reflex now when I cry

My mind twists and turns
while my heart goes insane
I have nothing to convince me
to let go of all the pain

Holding on seems easier
than giving up what means the most
even if its like no ones there
not even a ghost

Im really not ok
I have many more tears left uncried
I feel as if im running out of heart beats
in which my broken heart can no longer supply

Without you
theres simply no reason for me to be alive
Im even luck right now
to have the strength to survive...